Day 53 I spoke about Unconditional Love. I recognize myself in all I wrote, still I don’t feel that white, huge openness any more. Some door inside of me is shut and frozen, and I feel alone and like I made some kind of mistake, but unable to understand what went wrong. The challenge is almost done and I am a bit worried about not having a goal to wake up to every morning, as in the past month it’s been my gasoline to keep going.
At the same time I’m excited: I’m about to close a circle and accomplish yet another promise I made to myself: a long committment in which I gave more and more value to me and my abilities as a complete individual, involved in all its aspects – mental, emotional, physical and spiritual.
The Reiki and meditation of 20 minutes in the evening, with Susana, felt nice and intense, not overly disturbed by thinking, a few images flashing in my head. Phisically, my ears tend to warm up a lot everytime I give myself Reiki, especially when I move my hands on the heart chakra. I’ll keep going before sleeping (at least another 15minutes) to see if I can ease the blockage.
I just walked back home with Susana, completing the conscious walk for the day. We walked among the trees of London’s Road Park and I felt like I was walking inside a tunnel of green, strong and flowing energy. The trees are healthy and they live in symbiosis, not trying to overcome one another. They have a joyous quality that lifts up your spirit walking in their comforting shadow.
The air is chill, you can feel it’s autumn already, but also the wind tonight is very powerful and talkative. It speaks of things moving fast and about to change radically.
